DEB Does Dallas – My First Diner En Blanc Experience

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First of all, I gotta thank my girl Marsha for thinking of me when her friend B couldn’t attend Diner En Blanc (DEB) Dallas at almost the last minute (prayers for her still).  I probably should explain what this is before I share my thoughts.  Diner En Blanc is a secretive and exclusive pop-up dinner party where guests (who must be fashionably clad in all white) must bring their own supplies (including said dinner, drinks, table, chairs, silverware, glassware, tablecloths, linen napkins, trash bags, table decorations, etc) and everything must be white.  Guests don’t know where they are going until they board a chartered bus or other public transportation that takes them to the secret location of that year’s coveted Diner En Blanc.  The mysterious dinner parties are popular with a crowd that is just as exclusive and ritzy as the dinner itself because let’s face it — you gotta make one hell of an investment to get all that stuff I mentioned AND accept transporting it from a bus to the actual site of the dinner while wearing white.  Walking shoes are a must.  So is some type of dolly.  There are Diners in Blanc in about  6 continents and 70 cities worldwide.

I saw all of the beautiful photos at the first one in Dallas and was intrigued.  I decided I would go this year (3rd year in Dallas) but of course you need an invitation if you are not already on the list (I wasn’t).  I initially tried to get into DEB Dallas on my own (a sponsor makes it easier and for all the friends I had that were going, nobody ever offered to sponsor my black arse but I digress) and had gotten the email about a Phase 3 (what?) saying that I needed to log on at 9 a.m. on a certain date to receive an invitation. I took this to mean I was definitely “in” so I logged on about 10 and it was already sold out. Bummer.  I wasn’t going.

Apparently there are 2400 slots for the Dallas one.  At the time I didn’t know about bringing all your own stuff (EVERYTHING you need to have dinner including dinner!) and when I found out about that requirement, I remember saying “Look at GOD” cause I definitely didn’t have all of that stuff and wasn’t thinking about trying to get it NOR walk with it from some bus in my good white clothes and shoes.

And then Marsha called.  3 days before the event.  Black foke will spring some stuff on you at the last minute, won’t they?  I was still intrigued and I have Amazon Prime so I said why not?  I hopped on the site and quickly bought a table in the required dimensions, the tablecloth, the napkins.  Everything was going to be delivered in time except for chairs.  Ikea was out of them until Wednesday so I put that part on hold. Figured I’d order La Madeline for dinner.  Needed something so that if it was cold, it would still taste good.  I was too late to order alcohol but figured if I was going to be lugging all this sheeit in Blanc (excuse my French), I was gonna need SOMETHING to take the edge off.  I found some secret flasks on Amazon but won’t mention what they were in case I’m invited back.  I figured I had a white dress in my closet so I ordered only a fascinator.  You know I gotta have me a cute headpiece.  Later I would find out on Thursday night (event on Friday) that the zipper on the new dress was broken (no wonder it was so marked down at Ross).  I guess I was gonna be nekkid in a fashionable headpiece. Thank goodness for Charming Charlies at the last minute!

I also needed a date/guest.  Nate was out because he had to work late and I had just spent all our childcare money on supplies for this dinner party so he couldn’t come.  Somebody needed to watch the kid for free.  The bestie had a late call on the other side of town so she was out.  And then the next best friend to bestie told me yes.  I called another friend asking if I could really do this and her husband got me chairs (thanks Ro and Jace).  Then yet another friend walked me through everything I needed to know via FB messenger (Thanks SVEJ).  It was a lot, but I figured I could do this.  I threw a hand grenade in Basic Training and lived, and if I could do that AND beat breast cancer twice, I had this white party.

Our pick up spot was 4:15 at the Anatole…a long way away from Lewisville/Coppell in traffic but Liz got us there easily.  I did have to take off work (how do you get there on time otherwise?) early and picked up our food on the way. Oh, I also got white plates (my picnic basket), acrylic glasses, table decorations, and the other stuff.  I also ordered a luggage cart which was easily the BEST purchase decision I made.

We got to the Arboretum (perfect location) and set up our tables and ate our dinners.  We mingled, and perused, and danced, and selfie’d and Instagrammed and SnapChatted.  Everything was beautiful and magical.  And then we packed up everything and left the Arboretum like we had never been there.

I’ll say this – I went in thinking “this is some white people sheeit” (no offense, but think about it – I’m giving you $80 for you to take me somewhere SECRET on a BUS AND I gotta bring all my own sheeit?  And you telling me what to wear…and you won’t even let me bring my own wine?  Diner En Blanc BYE )  but came away thinking it was a very nice function.  I also can’t wait to go back.  Especially now that I have a folding table in a bag that I probably will never use anywhere else.  And an Amazon bill to pay off…..

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Act Like You Got Some Sense at an HBCU Homecoming – The 10 Commandments (UPDATED with 5 Bonus Commandments)

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I won’t make it to homecoming this year.  Hurricane Irma’s black behind blew through actin’ a fool and cancelled my baby’s Bahamian cruise and I had to reschedule it.  The “man” wouldn’t let me take any last minute vacation so I had to convert my existing vacation for my homecoming to my baby’s rescheduled cruise vacation.  Sometimes adulting and doing the right thing as a mama sucks.

I should have listened to her daddy who told me take her in March (never mind that she had waited a whole year to go in September and then couldn’t go).  The same daddy who by the way went to his own homecoming at West Virginia State last weekend.  Did I tell y’all how he only called us 3 times while he was there (4 days?).  I need to put that in my rules cuz he almost came back to a legal separation.

Anywhoo….let’s talk about  HBCU homecoming cuz some of y’all have contacted me for assistance (hey Terri, looking at YOU J)  I normally give y’all 10 commandments for homecoming-related behavior, but I’m gon’ go ahead and round it out to 15.  Moses probably woulda had 15 but he could only chisel so much before his hands got tired.  Let’s get into it:

  • Thou shalt not spend all your rent and bill money tryna “ball to you fall”. In other words, when you get back home, you gon’ need them lights, gas and water.  So if you cain’t afford premium liquor, water with lemon is the next best choice and is likely free.  You can even put it in a cocktail glass to keep your image intact. MC Breed said it best “ain’t no future (i.e. lights, gas, water, cable) in you frontin’.”
  • Thou shalt not get too damn drunk at parties. This should be a given, but as Big Mama used to say “Common sense ain’t all that common”.  First, your liver ain’t what it used to be when you were in your teens and early 20s.  Second, you are 40 or 50 now and likely somebody’s mama or daddy (even if you ain’t claiming them or paying your child support timely).  Maybe even somebody’s grandmama or granddaddy.  Fallin’ all out on the sidewalk, slurrin’ your words and peein’ on yourself (or even threatenin’ to) is NOT a good look.   Plus with all these would-be reporters, you gon’ end up on somebody’s PUBLIC Facebook Live or Instastory looking real crazy and beggin’ your boss to let you keep that good job.
  • Thou shalt not wear 10 minute shoes to 2 hour events. I know it’s half homecoming and half fashion show at these HBCUs, but you know your feet. GOD ain’t failed us yet, but them bad feet you got do and will.  Better to wear some cute flats with rhinestones than have them thangs barking and swelling up like you a second cousin twice-removed of the Klumps.
  • Thou shalt not act like thine is SINGLE, when thine ain’t. If you married, don’t be tryna act like you ain’t got a spouse cuz yo’ arse back on the yard.  Infidelity does count, even out of town and even at homecoming and even at some seedy $89 a night motel.  Plus, you gotta go home and the other party has to go home too.  Prolly to a disconnect notice (see the first bullet above).  You don’t need that kinda stress.  Plus, y’all ain’t make it 20 years ago, so what makes you think you will now?  Get you a hug, exchange pleasantries and get thee the hayle on. Matter of fact, don’t get the hug.  Your bodies will be too close…next thing you know, you dry grinding..then hunching.  Yep, just wave from a distance.
  • If you are newly single, thou shalt not wild out. Be careful out there in them streets.  It ain’t as carefree as it once was back in the day when you used to pray over the person and take a bath right after and you were mostly gon’ be okay.  Make sure you got your protection, and that you use it.  Maybe he was your first and/or vice versa back in the day, but y’all done had several boyfriends and girlfriends and even a husband or wife, or seven, so you need to act like he or she might have what Usher got or worse and have them roll up in some Saran wrap.  Plus, you can still get pregnant at 40 and 50, and I done already told y’all before numerous times how old people shouldn’t have kids. You supposed to be enjoying the twilight of your life and you at the Rite Aid buying both Pampers and Depends.
  • Thou shalt not forget thine personal limitations. You can’t go to every event or party and that’s perfectly reasonable. If there are five parties happenin’ on one day, maybe you can only make two.  And that’s only with a nap in between ‘em. That’s okay.  You old now..nobody expects you to still be able to kick it like you did when you were 20.
  • Thou shalt not drop it like it’s hot if thou is sufferin’ from creaky joints, bad knees, arthritis, carpal tunnel or any other ailment of old age. Ain’t nothin’ worse than bein’ THAT old person in the club with your hand in the air talmbout “hey naaaaahhhhh” while droppin’ it to the floor and gettin’ stuck there. Now your friends gotta stop drinkin’ and what they doin’ to pull your old arse up.  The two-step (movin’ side to side) plus a hand clap here and there is still a viable option for old people dancin’.
  • Thou shalt get thine beauty sleep. Schedule some nap time each day so you can look refreshed and well rested at parties and events.  You already old (yes, I keep having to remind you cuz you might get to homecoming and forget), so you don’t need to present with extra wrinkles and lines cuz you stayed up until four the night before eating all that greasy food at the Waffle House.  A good moisturizer will only do so much.
  • Thou shalt not show up at people’s tailgates, BBQs or house parties expectin’ to eat up where you go along and you ain’t put nothin’ on the party AND you empty handed. Consider bringin’ some boxed wine if your money is short (see first bullet point above) or your own meat and bread. I’m sure you friends got you on the condiments.  Ribs and such are EXPENSIVE.  Foke got kids to feed now..they cain’t be feeding you too unless you gon’ let them claim you on their taxes).
  • Greeks, if you are at a party, thou shalt not put a hole in them people’s floor steppin’. Plus, you likely bought those shoes you got on with your last paycheck on the way to homecoming (see first bullet point above).  You don’t need to tear up nobody’s floor or your own soles.  Also, smellin’ like Icy Hot the next day all up and through the party will get you talked about.
  • Thou shalt not take photos and videos of people and post them on social media without their permission. That Que you taking that video of or that cheek to cheek selfie with told his live-in woman that he was going to his great aunt’s funeral in Butte Crest Wyoming.  Now he gotta find somewhere else to live when he gets back home because his woman was looking for pictures of Aunt Bertha on his page and instead saw you and him hugged up.
  • Thou shalt not lose your mind eating stuff that no longer agrees with you. I was guilty of this a few years back.  Went to the tailgate and had gumbo, ribs, crab legs, peanut butter sandwiches, mac and cheese, bacon, hot links, barbecue skins (y’all know Black folks cook up and bring a lot of stuff to the tailgates and cookouts that don’t go together) and ended up missing the rest of homecoming cause I had to go to the emergency room to have my stomach pumped.
  • Thou shalt not forget to call home while you are at homecoming. I know homecoming is jam packed with activities and never ending action but you need to check in on your family even if you gotta just send a text or an email.  Plus if you left your baby home with your husband, you need to make sure his diaper got changed and he’s still alive.
  • Thou shalt NOT dance too close to anybody that is not your wife/husband or woman/man at the party when the DJ slows it down. First you slow dragging, then you dry grindin’, then you back in your hotel room (or his/hers) hunchin’ wondering how you got there and where you went wrong.  Then you’ll be on Instagram doing an apology video like Kevin Hart talking about you put your family at risk.
  • Thou shalt take the next day after you arrive home from homecoming off work. This is self-explanatory.  You are going to need one whole day to rest, sleep and recover because if your old arse does an HBCU homecoming right, you have had minimal sleep AND arrived back home late so you could get in that last minute Sunday brunch and/or meet and greet.  Don’t be at work noddin’ off when you can just save yourself the trouble by requesting an additional day of PTO.

BONUS – This is not really a commandment per se, but more of a PSA.  If you went to a PWI, go to your own damn homecoming.  Why you wanna come to mine?  Yeah, we will accept you if you show up cuz that’s how we are.  We will probably even feed you and make sure you got what you need to drink.  But, we gon’ talk about you as soon as you leave (now she know good and damn well she ain’t go here but had the nerve to wear a shirt and everything trying to claim us).  It’s just like pledging.  If you ain’t a part of the family, you won’t understand.  We love you but go to your own school’s homecoming.  I’m sure it’ll be fun with the other 20 black people that went there if you make it fun.  Just kidding…well sort of….

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Y’all got the commandments now.  Have a great time at your HBCU Homecomings, but govern yourselves accordingly.  THEEILOVE.

Follow me on Twitter and Facebook @soshaydee

Raina Dead & I’m Still Waiting for Both Tariq & Dre to Go Home To Glory – Power Recap S4E9

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I know this recap is late (grandmother’s funeral) but still felt like I should write should go ahead and write something.  I sho’ wish Raina had gotten out of the St. Patrick household and off to Choate (the private school) like she wanted.  But nope…she didn’t even get in and been attending classes FAITHFULLY.  Tariq, on the other hand, ain’t been in school since before Ghost got locked up and somehow managed to get selected.

But let’s talk about all that a little later – I need to recap the other parts of the episode.  Of course, I watched this at midnight on the Power Starz app because I am a Power fiend who can’t wait until it airs live on television.  I wish I could say I had a snack but I was struggling to stay awake and mighta missed a few scenes.  I would find myself sleep when I shoulda been all up in Ghost nem faces.  Anywho, Terisi is still Tommy’s dad and he wanted his son to come visit him.  Knowing Tommy got all kinds of felonies against his name and couldn’t come up there to visit unless he was gon’ start spendin’ nights in Terisi’s cell indefinitely.  Tommy had to get his birth certificate from Kate (his mama) but not after he broke up a right smart of her porcelain doll collection, put his hands around her neck and threatened to do to her what he did to Holly.  He finally sat down with Terisi and they both marveled at how much they resembled each other.  Tommy’s gonna meet his family (the other side) finally.

Ghost got the Victim of The Year award from some nonprofit and attended an awards banquet.  His ex-girlfriend Angela was also there and got promoted to Head of Criminal during the ceremony.  John Mak cussed in Chinese (Japanese?) because he had already walked up onstage and was standing there like Vesta (in the Congratulations video) lookin’ like it shoulda been me.

Tasha is still dry grindin’ with Terry Silver, and I am just tired of the writers forcing this ill-gotten relationship on us.  It is NOT believable and awkward because they have zero chemistry.  I think a video I saw this weekend of the actor who portrays him tells me why.  It also tells me why he put his shirt on before he put his pants on to answer the door for Ghost when he came over last episode.  Chile….

Dre, meanwhile, is still filling out his own death certificate burning up entire warehouse buildings of weight (drugs).  Kanan tried to holler at him about Dre’s late payments, even texting Dre talmbout “hey Bighead”.  Or maybe he said “hey lightskin”.  Same thing.  Tommy had to find money quick to keep his network in line so he went to Ghost and made him cut a check, after he tried to get Kesha back (to clean his money) and she wasn’t going.  He showed up to Ghost house high (he obviously doesn’t follow the 10 Crack Commandments — SEE NOTORIOUS BIG – because he would have known to never get high on his own supply.  He ended up head buttin’ Ghost, who had to go to the awards ceremony with a black eye that nobody mentioned.  I swear Ghost got them hands but he stay gettin’ stole on and catchin’ Ls.  Dre talked all the primeras into rolling out on Tommy in the meantime, and then quit as Distro (well he made Tommy fire his arse).  So now Tommy is alone. Oh, Dre also worked with Cristobal to send over henchmen to kill Kanan.  Two dudes who couldn’t kill a mouse with a rat trap apparently.  Kanan is that same negro that a fire couldn’t kill but you send over two fake arse “goons” to kill him with knives?  Really?  Kanan killed them two men five times over.  In like 2 minutes.  Dre is definitely going to die…it’s just a matter of how.

Tariq thought he could outrun his past, but unfortunately for Raina, that wasn’t going to happen.  He was trying his best to get out of town because Tariq knew causing that robbery Brains orchestrated to go left meant his arse.  I swear Brains shoulda changed his name to something else, because Ray Ray (Jukebox’s friend and fellow dirty cop) caught up with him and his partner and shot them both with no warning.  He ain’t have no damn brains.  But not before they told Ray Ray what happened with the robbery so Ray Ray knew he had one more loose end to tie up.  Tariq.

He went looking for Tariq in school (clearly he doesn’t know Tariq well or he would have known that negro ain’t neva in nobody’s class) and asked Raina if she’d seen her brother.  Raina later asked Tariq if he was in trouble and told him Raymond Jones came to school looking for him.  Tariq was clearly spooked out and was like “Ray Ray?”  He swore his sister to secrecy though, and told her she couldn’t snitch even after she really wanted him to tell Tasha.

Tariq’s girlfriend Destiny set him up for a meeting (behind that lean….how does he STILL have such a steady supply of it?) outside the school dance he and Raina attended.  Instead of Destiny, Ray Ray showed up to pop Tariq.  Of course, Tariq did what he always does when sheeit gets hot – he ran.  Raina came out of the dance and confronted Ray Ray, confirming that she knew who he was and that her dad was gonna graze his dirty cop temples.  Ray Ray fired a shot right through Raina’s heart, she fell in slow motion in all that snow and ice, and then Tariq came out of hiding to cry like Trey did in Boyz in the Hood when Ricky got shot.

Just like Tariq’s ol’ soft as Charmin Tissue arse – tried his best to speak up to save that random white lady he didn’t know last week but hid behind a wall to let Raina catch the bullet meant for his lean-addicted arse.  Yes, I’m still mad.  RIP sweet Raina.  I feel like I JUST got to know you because you had a bunch of lines finally and cussed at your mama!  I hope your sister gets out (I know we only see her every 4th episode) before Tariq arse get her killed too.  Maybe Choate got a kindergarten program.  Raina

Follow me on Twitter @soshaydee for the live tweets on Power on Sunday nights.  Be sure to check out some of my old ones….

 

Mr. Trump is Who We Thought He Was

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To be completely transparent, I didn’t watch the televised coverage of the events in Charlottesville.  I was already horrified by the images on social media of what was happening there.  I did not want to see it “real time” because I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it.  Blame it on my horoscope (Cancer) but I knew I would be way too emotional to watch what was happening in this country.  Full disclosure – I wrote “our country” initially and had to delete it.  Because I don’t believe this is my country even though it should be more mine than Trump’s since it was built on the backs of my people and I donned a uniform and fought for it.

I took to Twitter Saturday to get a handle on how people were responding to the white nationalism demonstration in Charlottesville and noticed a curious hashtag.  #ThisIsNotUs  I weighed in with the following response:  “Ah, but it is.  Unfortunately it has always been us.  Until we address racism & bigotry head-on it will continue to be us.”  If I had additional characters, I probably would have added that minority groups are not responsible for dismantling racism.  We didn’t establish it.  So the “we” addressing racism has to be the group that put it in place.  Which brings us to our elected leader, Trump.

Now Trump consistently showed us throughout the entire election cycle exactly who and what he was.  He made no apologies for having to be sued by the federal government because he wouldn’t rent to Black people.  He ran his campaign on the plan to round up illegal immigrants and build a wall so they could no longer get into this country.  He stood with the David Dukes and the Steve Bannons of the world as he proclaimed he would “make America great again” which was code for make America white and non-diverse again.  This is the same “leader” who told police officers recently not to be too nice when they are apprehending people.  Reading between the lines, those people would overwhelmingly be people of color.  The same people of color who have to fight hard not to die at the hands of a police officer when we are pulled over on a traffic stop.  Color me not surprised that he did not speak out against the racist, hateful, bigoted display in Charlottesville, where a white supremacist turned his car into a weapon, ramming it into counter-protesters, killing a young mother and injuring others.

Lawmakers and citizens called for Trump to say something…but he was noticeably silent for TWO HOURS (gathering facts he said).  He finally came out with a response that was soft on racism.  And then today, two days after Saturday’s tragic racist display, in the Trump Towers no less, he came out and said what he really meant to say on Saturday:  There was blame to be had on both sides.  The “alt-left” is just as much to blame as the “alt-right”.  The “alt-left” didn’t even have a permit and went charging against the nice neo-Nazis and white supremacists who just wanted to keep their nice statue of a fine man, Robert E. Lee.  Then he likened that traitor (Robert E. Lee) to George Washington.  Yes, the same traitor who fought to keep slavery in this country.  David Duke tweeted his approval.

NOW, people are appalled, when truthfully, they should have been appalled in November.  They should have been appalled enough to not vote for this man who showed them at every turn that he is a racist.  But maybe they thought he was just playing…just talking…and when he got into office, surely he would become the President of ALL people…brown, black, yellow, gay, straight, female, male, transgender, Muslim, Jew.  I’m reminded of what Big Mama always said, “When people show you who they are, believe them.”  Nothing Trump does in that White House surprises me.  I’m just surprised or should I say disappointed by the people who continue to support him.  When is enough going to be enough?  Will he have to lynch somebody on the front lawn of the White House for y’all to get that he is not fit to be President?  Who in that Republican party and among his supporters are willing to take a stand?  I hear crickets….

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Lord Not JULIO! – Power Recap, S4E6

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I struggled with what to title this blog post.  Part of me wanted to title it “EVERYBODY Got Killed” (cuz everybody did).  Part of me wanted to title it “Live in the Sky”, an ode to Julio.  I finally settled on Lord Not Julio because I still can’t believe he is gone.  And let me be clear…..he’s gone.  I know y’all want him to be alive, but unless he is part cat (with 9 lives), he is currently residing in the Upper Room.  Before I talk about his murder, let’s talk about Ghost’s first day out of jail.

He had a nightmare about bashin’ Marshall Williams’ brains in and woke up to find he was in his bed at his penthouse alone.  Now I ain’t mad at Tasha for not sleeping next to him – she doesn’t know whose drawls he had to wash and who he had to give his Biscuit (pun intended) to to survive.  It is also likely that he still smelled like jail.  That’s hell to get out of your nice 800 thread count sheets.  He got up to take a shower and BAY BAY – we got an ol’ nasty, only slightly blurry shot of them hindparts.  Ghost is BLESSED, and I was blessed just to see it.  Hupp Glo-Ray!

He tried to push up on Tasha but she wasn’t going.  Not with him smelling like jail AND professing his forever love re: Angela AND watching Angela destroy her career to save Ghost’s hindparts.  I was glad – I wouldn’t even give Ghost the satisfaction of rubbing my booty.  For that long (he fine, so I probably would break down for a few minutes).  Ghost asked about his children who all had better places to be the night he got out other than home.  That’s right – Ghost been in jail for half the season, and none of his kids were home waiting for him when he got out, not holding nary a sign or balloon.  Tasha wrong for that sheeit.  Ghost needs to call Child Protective Services anonymously on her.

Ghost ran out to Truth which finally got the “club” taken off of it (got re-opened by the Feds).  He was barely in there for 30 seconds before Stern showed up to discuss payback of the loan Tasha took.  I’m sooo not understanding this loan AFTER she knew Ghost was getting out and soooo not understanding what she did with such a sizable sum, because it had to be sizable for Stern to now control Ghost.  He wants Ghost to head up a new business venture so he can get a minority loan using Ghost’s brown skin.  And he wants to claim all three of Ghost’s kids (even the little part-time baby) on his taxes.  Well I made that last part up but he might.  Of course, Ghost was mad at Tasha but couldn’t say too much since she held him down while he was “inside”.

Tommy took that road trip to Chicago to see the big boss and ended up talking wayyy too much at dinner after a thousand shots (so not like Tommy to let his guard down but he thought he was in I guess after the big bosses offered a promotion of sorts).  They threw Tommy’s arse in the trunk after he talked about killing Milan and took him to a big arse gravesite.  HIS gravesite.  Tommy was on his knees, and Petar showed up talkin’ noise talmbout he didn’t know Tommy killed Milan.  Tatiana (Milan’s ol’ lady) showed up and saved Tommy right before the gunshot (where he was thinking of seeing an angelic Holly – knowing good and well that thane ain’t in nobody’s heaven) and the big bosses shot Petar instead and his arse fell in the grave.  Tommy ended up in Cleveland and beat Holly’s old molesting arse realtor uncle to death with a bat that was in an open house the uncle was showing.  Oh this seems out of the blue?  That’s cuz it was.  SMH.   I guess Tommy did it for Holly but since he killed her too it didn’t make a lot of sense.

Meanwhile, Julio confronted Dre about seeing him with Kanan.  Dre started double talking and got Julio all confused and talked him into the both of them taking out Cristobal for running his mouth about extra bricks and sheeit.  But Dre had another plan – he met with Cristobal and Julio’s old gang members and came up with a plan to set Julio up for the gang members to get revenge (Ghost had bought Julio’s freedom like he was a new age slave but now that Ghost was out the game, that agreement was void).

Julio agreed to meet Dre.  At night.  Alone.  IN AN ABANDONED BUILDING.  Exactly – sheeit didn’t go well.  There Julio found his old gang members (now enemies) waiting on him, instead of finding Dre.  I told y’all last time Julio wasn’t smart or ruthless enough to be Distro.  They STAYED disrespecting him and talking bad about him.  He needed to be on a PIP and demoted.  It took THREE gang members to finally take ol’ footdragging Julio out but not before he took two of them out even after he had been all sliced and cut up.  The last most ruthless dude cut that 718 tat out of Julio’s neck with no anesthesia and then stuck Julio for the last time in the chest.  Julio tried to crawl up outta that thane but the blood loss and the 122 stab wounds were too much and he trembled, cried out and died.  LORD NOT JULIO!

At the same time, Jukebox still had Tariq lil gullible arse.  Jukebox ain’t have no tv, no video games, no snacks but that lil negro ain’t know he was kidnapped.  Kanan kidnapped Ghost who thought he saw a ghost when Kanan rolled up on him and made him steal money from Tommy’s stash house (where some other people died) before having him drive to the abandoned house where Juke was holding Tariq.  Kanan also tried to find out WHY Ghost set him up and Ghost told him he had two choices – kill Kanan or put him on the inside.  Kanan was like a brother to him so he wasn’t going to kill him.  Kanan told him he made the wrong choice and popped Ghost’s head into the steering wheel.

Kanan gave Ghost his gun when they got to the house..telling him he could shoot Kanan OR use it to help Kanan free Tariq.  I knew his burnt crispy arse had feelings for Tariq! Ghost went with the plan but Juke wasn’t going.  She figured out what was going on (both Kanan and Ghost were setting her up) and threatened to kill Ghost and the boy.  She was right behind Tariq with the gun and made Kanan tell Tariq EVERYTHING.  Also made Ghost tell the truth about who he was.  And then Kanan shot Jukebox’s arse.  Three times.  And then told her she talked too much, grabbed the money, told Tariq ‘see you later lil ninja’ and was out.  Yep.  After all those seasons of waiting to get revenge on Ghost, it ended with Kanan letting Ghost and Tariq live.  A big build up for a quick arse let-down. Anti-climactic.  I guess when you the EP, you get to make those kinda storyline decisions but it left me feeling some kinda way.

Ghost hugged Tariq, told him “I got you” but Tariq didn’t hug back.  I really think Tariq shoulda got at least his temples grazed for always doing wrong sheeit and them two birdies he threw up to sweet Raina last episode.

So there you have it.  More people died in last night’s episode of Power than in New Jack City.  I was fine with everybody who caught a bullet except for Julio.  I’m going to be mourning all week.  Soo is too when she finds out.  She probably gon’ have to look for another job and somebody else to have marathon sex sessions with.

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This Ended Up Being a Good Week for Black Foke – Power Recap, S4E5

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You know the week didn’t start out that great for Black foke.  R Kelly out here stealing whole people and keeping them against their will.  Usher letting it burn with these women out here in the streets, literally, and having to pay them a gang of money.  And then, OJ had his parole hearing on Thursday…and those parole board people messed around and let OJ out of jail (well in October).  Then Girls Trip, a movie with 4 Black female lead actresses, ran the box office on Friday and Saturday.  The only thing Black foke needed  for a triple-double was Obamacare to stay intact and Ghost to get out of prison.

Episode 5 started with Ghost still in jail.  He looks cute in orange but I’m ready for him to get out before he has to wash Terisi’s drawls.  Angela visited Ghost after she tried to talk to Sandoval about the tape and never seeing Ghost hide the gun in it.  Sandoval wasn’t trying to hear anything Angela was saying because he is hellbent on pinnin’ Greg’s murder on Ghost.  Angela gave Silver and Ghost some information about the prosecution trying to turn the case into a RICO one.

Silver told Tasha she would probably have to testify about St. Patrick’s assets since the prosecution found a check for a grip from Tommy to Ghost.  Ghost ended up taking the stand instead and Sandoval cross-examined him and did a pretty good job of it too.  Ol’ strong jawed killing arse.   Back in jail, Terisi was still mad that Ghost stopped that extortion scam he had set up before it got started really.  He put a bug in Marshall Williams’ ear that Ghost was behind his transfer to another prison.  Terisi had a plan to take out Ghost and Marshall fell right into the trap.  Ghost was in jail trying to keep them abs and triceps poppin’ and in walked Marshall Williams.

Everybody else disappeared and then he started talkin’ crazy to Ghost bout him (Williams) possibly hunchin’ Tasha and having her and Ghost kids call HIM daddy.  Y’all know Ghost gets mad quick and ain’t NOBODY safe.  We talmbout the same dude that in the past put on a black hoodie and killed everybody but Ruiz and Tommy on one damn episode.  He start beating Williams with a weight and bust his head all the way to the white meat.  Literally.  I’m talkin’ bout Williams was unrecognizable – a skull, teeth, and gums pretty much.  I thought damn, that’s gotta leave a stain..and in walked Terisi and Biscuit.

Biscuit had a shank in the one good hand Ghost left him with and thought he was bout to slice up Ghost, but Terisi had other plans.  He killed Biscuit with his bare hands (choked him up in some type of figga 4 headlock) and then made Ghost change clothes with Biscuit.  They strung Biscuit up on a belt on some type of suicide sheeit and made it look like he killed Williams and then killed himself.  Ghost didn’t have to murder Williams lil frail self like that though.  Chile…. I am still having nightmares behind that murder.  Speaking of murders, Williams wasn’t the only one…Soo’s Hello Kitty got killed too.  By Julio.  I’m talmbout she needed to take a leave of absence from work after all that hunching and dry grindin’ and whatnots.

What else..oh Stern was back tonight trying to offer Ghost a loan.  You know his money comes with all kinds of strings and stipulations attached.  Ghost turned it down.  Good.  I ain’t liked him since he was the engineer on Titanic and couldn’t stop it from sinking.  I guess Raina nem gon’ be out of private school for a while (last week, Tasha’s check bounced).  It probably doesn’t make a difference for Tariq.  He wasn’t going to school anyway and if he was, he wasn’t learning sheeit.  He did lose his virginity last week – he ended up telling Tommy.  He said he used protection but I ain’t so sure.  The way he out here stealing 32 inch tvs without the remotes from his friend’s condos.

Tasha figured out Tommy was doin’ Kesha and told him to be careful because she could flip on them if he breaks her heart.  Tommy also came clean about choking out and killing Holly.  Tasha said she understood – ANYTHING to protect the family.  DAMN.

Angela came to court to testify for the defense, finally believing that Ghost didn’t kill Greg.  You know Mak, Sandoval and Saxe were so mad they didn’t know what to do.  Mak tried to throw Angela under the bus behind her sexual relationship with Ghost, but the judge had heard enough.  He dismissed the charges against Ghost without prejudice!  Yasss!

Meanwhile, Tommy was summoned to Chicago by the connect.  And had the nerve to leave his phone with one of his henchmen.  Now Ghost can’t call him and Julio can’t tell him he saw Kanan talking to Dre.  And Ghost can’t give Tommy the phone Terisi gave him when he processed out, asking for Tommy to call him (Terisi) on it.  Terisi said if Ghost didn’t give Tommy that flip phone, he was gonna tell the truth about what happened with Marshall Williams.

Tasha ended up hugging Silver just a little longer than she should have in a private moment back at the St. Patrick penthouse….and it was awkward and uncomfortable for me.  Please sweet baby Jesus don’t let them start dry grinding with each other.  He told her that she may need some money before the assets were unfrozen.  She called Stern.  THREE HOURS before James was gonna get out of jail.  That is going to bite her right in her all black wearing arse.  And of course Tariq was once again outta pocket.  Shoulda been home hanging streamers and blowing up balloons for Ghost Welcome Home Party but instead he was back in that raggely arse apartment trying to hang with Kanan.  But instead of Kanan, Jukebox arse was there.  In that cop uniform that she always have on looking like a low-budget female version of Otis (Martin Lawrence show).  I guess she found out about Ghost, turned on her sirens, and took the express lanes from Baltimore, DC or wherever she from.

When Kanan walked in, she told him the plan was back on – kidnap Tariq, get Ghost’s money, and then kill Tariq AND Ghost.  She bout to get her non-civilian clothes havin’ arse killed fooling around with Ghost’s child.  Even though Tariq needs to at least have both his temples grazed for what he out here doing, and Tasha needs a visit from Child Protective Services.

Ghost is outta jail, y’all!  Freed just like OJ.  Look at GOD! Won’t HE do it!!!!

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OJ Simpson – Let That Man Outta Them People’s Jail

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Can we just talk about OJ’s facial expression in this photo? This may have been the exact moment he realized he got off for killing everybody in that driveway that night except that Akita but was goin’ to jail for stealing his own stuff back via armed robbery. And let’s be clear – I always thought he stole his own stuff back and wondered how 6 to 8 grown arse old men sat around and came up with the idea to do an armed robbery and not a one said “you know OJ…this might not be a good idea. The Goldmans, LAPD and their blue brethren all over the country and Mark Fuhrman are still watching you Man. You may want to just charge those old footballs and Hertz posters to the game…” But come to find out not only did he take back some of his old jerseys, he also left outta there with Joe Montana and Pete Rose sheeit. So what was THAT about? Said OJ had put that stuff on EBAY. But I digress.

 

Tomorrow is OJ’s parole hearing. Apparently, somebody has asked Black foke to protest. OJ this ain’t 1995. Black foke tried to ride with you because of what happened with Rodney King, but as soon as them people let you off, you turned back white and was back playin’ golf and dealing with loose women and thots. And then had the nerve to write a book talmbout if you did it. Knowing good and well your arse did it. I doubt if you gon’ get two protesters outside that courtroom. And if you do it’s because they nosy. They probably ain’t gon’ even have signs.

That said, it’s time for OJ to be released. He is not in prison for Ron and NIcole’s murders – he got off remember? All of the other men that were involved in this armed robbery are out. Only ONE of them did actual time (some months I think). The rest got probation in turn for flippin’ on OJ. I ain’t mad at that. I woulda flipped on his dumb arse too. That man has served his time for armed robbery and been a model citizen in prison, running the gym and washin’ drawls. It’s time for OJ to make parole and hit the talk show circuit so that any lil money he makes can go to the Goldmans ….

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