RHOA Recap – LAWD Cynthia Kicked That Lady in the Boo Boo Kitty

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So if you think RHOA fell off when Lanethia (NeNe) Leakes left or that the drama has simmered down, you might be just a lil bit wrong.  Yesterday was the continuation of the 3 hour tour that Kenya “Gilligan” Moore put together for the ladies.  In the first installment, Cynthia and Porsha brought “friends” to the gathering.  Now most of the time when you bring a “plus one” to an invitation only event, the plus ones know to hang in the back, not make eye contact, and just lay low.  Not in this case.  You had one tryna get on with Kandi and the other one comin’ for Kenya.  Atypical fallback behavior.

Now what you NOT gon’ do is get on a boat that Kenya done chartered and come for her, lest you end up walkin’ the plank and tossed overboard.  Kenya decided she had enough of that lady that nobody else knew (Porsha’s friend Shemea) and summoned the ship’s captain to take her back to the shore.  Somewhere in the mist of all that, Porsha was tryna defend her friend and said “whateva bee” to Cynthia.  Cynthia, who is still mad at Peter for grazing that lady’s titties in that bar he got in Charlotte, went off on Porsha who then told Cynthia she betta chill cuz she ain’t want her (Porsha) to get up.  I thought it had been squashed cuz Cynthia walked off.

With emotions runnin’ high and all that oil in errybody, Porsha went over to talk to Cynthia.  That was ill-advised but ain’t none of them housewives or randoms try to stop her.  I thought they were going to handle that situation like two adults and then remembered this is RHOA and foke don’t neva handle situations like that.  It escalated rather quickly and ‘fo I knowed it, they were both wavin’ they fangahs in others faces.  Cynthia told Porsha she might be dumb, but she ain’t that dumb…and Porsha told Cynthia she was fake as eff.  And then I believe Cynthia told Porsha to get her hand out of her face, pushed her hand, Porsha stood up ova Cynthia and promptly got a push kick to the pelvis.  I’m talmbout Cynthia put that size 13 embellished flat right in betwixt Porsha’s legs and gave it the ol’ heave ho.  Thank GOD Cynthia wasn’t wearin’ heels cuz Porsha would be sterile with a puncture wound to her uterus right now.  Chile, I ain’t neva seen two women get that crunk and turned up that quickly ova nothing!  I still don’t know what they were fightin’ about.

At this point, I could recap the rest of the show, but I don’t want to increase my word count unnecessarily.  There was a lot of discussion among the women about what happened and who was at fault.  Porsha showed her wounds (I believe most came from the Bravo security man who grabbed her and threw her down on a chair and got on top of her like Mistah fin to do his bidness on top of Celie).  At the end, the other ladies brought the two women together and they made up.  Until the next fight.

I just want to say to the two white people that might read this blog – what those women did is not indicative of my race as a whole.  We don’t just jump on each other for nothin’…and most of us are capable of using our words.  Porsha might have an anger management problem cuz that thane will fight anybody (see Kenya two seasons ago) and Cynthia…well I want to give her some slack cuz her husband out there bad in them streets.  I just don’t want y’all to think that erry black woman is loud, ghetto, and ready to act a fool on water or dry land.  Now we might cuss you out or make you feel beat the hayle up, but we ain’t hardly grown women out here fightin’.

Follow me on Twitter @staylorclark cuz I’m fun.

RHOAseason8

 

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