A friend sent me a link to the funniest thang this mornin’, and I just had to share so y’all could holler and scream laughin’ too. Y’all know Chris Brown? Bout yay tall….beat up Rihanna real bad in them people’s car and had her face all swole up….can dance real good……got kilt in the first (and the best) Stomp The Yard after he won the dance-off…..be goin’ back and forth between Rihanna and that Karucchi gul….STAY in trouble and on probation….just got out of jail earlier this year. Trouble and bad luck just seems to follow Chris Brown but it’s usually cuz of his own stupid choices. i don’t know if y’all know this but he was sentenced to bout a thousand hours of community service for his last run-in with the law. He’s been pickin’ up trash on the side of the freeway or making license plates or something.
Well anyway, Trey Songz (y’all know Trey – bout yay tall *doin’ hand thang* and real fine like if you was a Cougar you’d be tryna holla) put him on his tour. I ain’t mad at that. That’s a good look for a tour, and it will only boost Chris Brown’s public image, which has taken a real beating (pun intended). Well, don’t you know, Chris still got them bad roots on him cuz come to find out, he can’t even much go on the tour until he finishes his community service. Apparently, he got 100 hours left. And they just found out that the first legs of the tour will have to be cancelled or rescheduled because of it. We all know how hard it is to buy concert tickets in this economy. They be high as hayle! I had to ask them people at the gas comp’ny for an extension to go to Beyonce and Jay Z’s concert and I was in the cheap seats. Gas prices ain’t been under $2 for that damn long and errythang is just more expensive these days. So when fans are scratchin’ and survivin’ like James Evans, and they buy a ticket to a concert, they expectin’ to attend a SHOW. They wanna see tricks and fireworks and twerkin’ and foke risin’ up from the stage floor and flyin’ down outta the ceiling. They don’t wanna hear bout no damn cancellations!
Chris Brown loves him some social media when honestly he could benefit from deactivatin’ some of that sheeit for bout fo’ or fi’ months and use the time saved from Tweetin’ and Instagrammin’ to finish that trash pick-up community service. Instead he took to it to announce that the first legs of the tour would be cancelled. And Bay Bay….one fan…when she found out she wasn’t gonna see Trey Songz sangin’ Ooooh Na Na….went LEFT on Chris’ troubled arse right on Instagram. And I read it and abruptly collapsed and DIED from laughter! I couldn’t stop the laughs from comin’. They started out as a chuckle and then erupted into full-fledge SCREAMS. This fan got Chris Brown all the way together. I got my fangers crossed that Chris responds (cuz we know he likes to go after foke that come fuh him, and he goes hard like a “beyotch boy”) so I can get my life again behind this post. Chile…this fan READ Chris Brown like an overdue “li-berry” book that you try to sneak and return so you don’t have to pay them damn fees! Imma stop talmbout it and let you read it for yourself (don’t forget to follow me on Twitter @staylorclark)