My Damn Breasts Tried to Kill Me! TWICE!

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Yes, they did.  All this time I thought they were my friends.  Shoot…I used to kick it with them and take off my shirt sometimes just to watch them in awe.  They were the source of so much…er..um….”joy”.  Let’s just say I knew why they were called “fun bags”.  Having breast cancer though is no fun.  Having it twice is downright sad.  Yes, I was diagnosed with breast cancer at 34 the first time.  I had just lost my young, beautiful and vibrant mother-in-law, Miss Linda, to the same disease the year prior.  She was 46.  I never thought that my kid wouldn’t get to know her Nana but because of the disease, that’s exactly what happened.  I had a recurrence last year and fought a long hard battle that I will have to tell you about later. 

I friggin’ hate cancer.  Clearly, all types, but breast cancer even moreso because of what it took from me – my boobs (yep, both gone and my reconstruction failed so at the moment I don’t even have fake ones); my hair (it was thick too….I remember cutting it off and putting it in a bag in preparation for chemo – now that I think about it, why did I even put it in a bag?  It wasn’t like I was gon’ glue it back on…); my nails (they turned black and at some point, I lost my big toenails – ouch AND ugh); my energy (there were days when I didn’t have enough energy to walk to the mailbox or play with my kid); my money (cancer treatment is EXPENSIVE – even with insurance, those co-pays and deductibles and out of pockets are just as killer as the disease!); my appetite (I dropped about 30 lbs, which wasn’t all that bad actually but I do miss my old butt – boy you could sit a drank on that thang…but I digress); and my social life (I went from brunchin’ and happy hourin’ with my friends to being a recluse). 

But cancer couldn’t rob me of everything.  It didn’t rob me of my joy, my peace, my faith, my will to live, the love and support I received from family and friends, or my spirit.  It damn sure didn’t rob me of my sense of humor.  Laughing when I wanted to cry surely helped my disposition.  There were some funny moments – losing one expander and being left temporarily with a Uniboob (just like its distant cousin, the Unibrow, nobody wants one); whippin’ out my fake boob at the dentist (hey, I got confused); asking for jello at the hospital and being given some generic brand that had expired 2 months earlier;  and the wind taking my wig off in front of the oncology center.  You had to be there….

Anyway, I felt like sharing today.  If you know anybody battling cancer, please love and support them.  Do something nice for them.  Hug them if they aren’t worried about blood counts and a compromised immune system.  Offer to take their kid(s) off their hands for a while..to clean their house…cook them some dinner.  I had all of that and more from my circle of friends, sorors, and family.  I will never forget their kindness….though I struggle to live each day in this “new normal” as I try to forgive my breasts for turnin’ on me….. 

 

 

Sheila Taylor Clark is a two-time breast cancer survivor and an Honorary Survivor and Everyday Hero for the 2014 Komen Dallas Race For The Cure

Sheila Taylor Clark is a two-time breast cancer survivor and an Honorary Survivor and Everyday Hero for the 2014 Komen Dallas Race For The Cure

 

5 thoughts on “My Damn Breasts Tried to Kill Me! TWICE!

  1. Soror! I have watched and prayed silently as you have continuously shared your story with us. I am so happy to know someone as brave and strong as you are! Even though it sucks, it is just a bump in the road for you. You still have greater things to accomplish in this life time! Kick cancer’s butt! *hugs*

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  2. RENEE MCCOY

    Sheila, you are truly blessed more than you’ll ever know. Maybe I should have went to college and joined a sorority so I would have gained sisters for life. They really supported you, I didn’t have that but what I did have was my GOD who revealed my cancer to me as I slept and was with me every step of the way. Don’t get me wrong I had the support of my husband and some family members. (My children? UGH!) I have no complaints, I wish everyone including you could have had the experience I had with surgery, 8 rounds of chemo and 18 weeks of radiation. On September the 7th I will be celebrating my 2nd year of survivorship this is the day I had my lumpectomy. I THANK GOD for my trial for without it I have no testimony. BOOBS are overrated! The larger they are the further they hang and I know you like to travel so it will less you’ll have to pack later in life! LOL

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    • Thansk Renee! I wish that every womn going through this would have the support I received. I am still amazed at how much my friends and family came through for me. I will never forget their kindness and generosity! LOL @ the last part. Um, I will take breasts for $200 Alex!

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  3. Shamma

    I admire you and pray for you. If we were closer I would have had Hannah watch Mckenzie lol and I would have cooked you some Jamaican porridge or whatever you like. May God keep you continually

    Like

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