I am too embarrassed to be just outright recapping Love & Hip Hop Hollywood because I’m shame that I actually watch it.  But hey, Monday’s a slow night…I watch Dancin’ With The Stars, The Wanna Be Stars, The Has Beens and the Never Wases and then I’m all up in Fatal Attraction and For My Man.

For My Man is about all these women that have committed murders and got locked up behind a man.  You got to have some real good stuff to make a person wanna give up all they freedom for prison.  Ain’t no way.  I’m kinda cute too.  I wouldn’t last 10 minutes in prison befo’ I’d have to fight for my conebread and buy my way out of cuffing season with a box of cigarettes.

I only know a couple foke from LHHH – Brandy’s little brother, Ray J and Omarion.  Oh and Soldier Boy.  Ray J keeps tryna come up since he let Kim K go and she went on to be quadruple the star he is, but this story line with him and Tierra Marie and Princess is too much.  I think he really wants Princess even though she jumped on him in Nawlins and to’ that thane’s ACL off.  Again, she must have some good stuff cuz he still followin’ up behind her.  They say them crazy ones have that THANE.

Lil B is Whitney Houston’s goddaughter (so she says…it ain’t like Whitney (RIP) is here to deny it) and is so overly dramatic, it works my nerves.  She’s with some super producer (supposedly but you on this show, like the rest of the cast who STAY in the studio but don’t neva have nothin’ playin’ on the radio which boggles my mind) and he obviously doesn’t wanna be married.  Tonight, she tried to chase him (he was in a truck) while wearin’ a maxi skirt that was tight like one of those dresses Geisha girls wear when their feet are bound.  Bay Bay..I hollered when he sped off in reverse.

There was drink throwin’ and face mushin’ but I don’t really know the randoms who were involved and don’t care enough to google.  Oh, there is also a gay rapper on the show.  He is living a secret life.  Yeah, on a NATIONALLY TELEVISED REALITY SHOW.  But yet, my black arse still watched it.

Anthony Anderson (the comedian) is getting a divorce.  That saddens me.  They were high school sweethearts.  She loved him through obesity and effed up teeth and bit parts and chump change and he uses her up for 20 years and then moves on.  Here’s hoping she gets some good shiny coins for her troubles.

My prayers go out to Kim Zolciak of RHOA fame because she apparently had a stroke on her left side.  Of course, she posted a selfie wearing an oxygen mask from her hospital bed.  I’da been more impressed if she had taken a selfie from a wheelchair, you know seein’ that her left side was s’posably numb.  But anyway, she had to withdraw from Dancing With The Stars which was probably her plan all along.  It’s football season..and she wants to be at her husband’s games in Atlanta not in LA.  And she got like 4 kids under 6, so I’m sure she too tired to practice.  I will miss her…she was HORRIBLE the first time but was actually good last week.  Oh well…there’s always Chaka Khan.  Oh wait..she gone too.  I guess I will cheer for Tamar.

Follow me on Twitter @staylorclark