Scandal Recap – Lawd Florence From the Jeffersons Been Dry Grindin’ With Liv’s Next Door Neighbor!

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Tonight was another night of Scandal.  I never thought I’d say this, but I miss Daddy Pope as Command.  Doin’ all kinds of evil sheeit.  Sayin’ them long arse monologues where he don’t even stop to take a breath.  Letting himself in Olivia’s apartment when she ain’t home.  Creatin’ killcards for ol’ B613 agents.  Meeting Liv on them people’s park bench.  Scandal ain’t got a lot goin’ on without Daddy Pope and B613 and such.  I don’t think the shows that good unless somebody gets Hucked and Liv is fixin’ it and whatnots.  But what can you do?  Daddy Pope is somewhere fishin’ for brim, and I’m still watching.

Tonight’s episode was mostly about gettin’ that lil chunky white lady who is a new Senator confirmed as Vice President.  Fitz picked her because she is supposably unelectable as President, to clear the way for a Presidential run for ol’ Mellie Mel at some point.  They dressed that lil white lady up in a nice suit and sensible shoes (apparently Fitz’ constituents love them a lady VP that reads the Bible and wears kitten heels – See Sally the old VP/murderer) and armed her with a bunch of canned phrases and quotes.  That thang ain’t, however, the brightest bulb in the box, so even with all that prep she managed to mess up them people’s press conference.  She started off well, and then went off script, and then laughed.  And hiccupped.  And snorted.  All at the same damn time.  So that the next day, that’s all the press talked about.

Red (Abby) brought in her boyfriend..the one that tried to help get Sally elected to President to get that lil white lady all the way together.  And he did, but he was so over the top about it.  Susan Ross (the lil stocky white lady’s name just came to me!) ended up doing well on her media blitz tour, but Abby couldn’t stand her man’s tactics and fiyah’ed him which meant to him, he was also fiyah’ed up outta her bedroom.  No mo’ dry grindin’ for Abby.

They finally got Liv back involved in helping the White House and helping ol’ girl get confirmed by the Senate.  The Senate was still mad at Fitz though so it wasn’t lookin’ good for ol’ Fitz.  Liv reminded him how he went to war – one minute he wasn’t..the next he was..and the next, the war was ova.  He walked up on her like he was gon’ either hit or kiss her, but he ended up tellin’ her she knew why he went to war.  In other words, Liv got that thang, and it’s so powerful and good that it made him send in the troops.  Liv told him to go beg the Senate for forgiveness and Susan Ross would be confirmed.  Fitz did just that (y’all know his nose wide open fuh Liv so he do anythang she say) and Susan Ross became VP.

Huck’s wife took those B613 files to David Rosen who was shocked as hayle to see ‘em.  She told him she got them from her husband, Diego Munez, who worked as a spy for them.  I see why Huck changed his damn name.  Anyway, David Rosen went straight to Jake (from State Farm) with the news, and they were both tryna figga out who Diego was so Jake could kill him for putting errybody at risk with those secret files.  Huck was listenin’ at first, but then went on and confessed.  Bay Bay…he was betta than me cuz I wouldna told sheeit.  They woulda had to use they Spidey senses, sniffin’ dogs, Becky Oliver (she’s an investigative reporter for Channel 8), and fo’ private eyes to figure out that I was Diego Munez.  Y’all know Jake don’t play.  Jake is used to killing people.  With all kinds of quickness.  I ain’t gon’ neva forget how he kilt Cyrus’ husband and then helped usher him on home to glory.  Huck said he would testify that he had PTSD and he made the story up to squash it.  But y’all know Huck real crazy.  And his wife had invited him ova for dinner, so he was havin’ flashbacks of getting some and thought he had the chance to get some ‘mo’, and went against the plan and start tellin’ all kindsa sheeit bout them people’s Hole and B613 at the deposition, momentarily throwin’ ol’ David Rosen for a loop.  David Rosen’s eyes got moist listenin’ to Huck describe livin’ in the hole, and he told Jake he was gon’ blow the lid off B613 with an investigation.  Lawd David Rosen..you done cheated death 2 or 3 times, but look like yo’ card is finally gon’ get punched.

And now we are at the end of this recap, and I been savin’ the “best” of the episode for last.  Y’all remember how Florence from the Jeffersons was on Scandal a couple of weeks ago, as Lois (Liv’s neighbor that looked a lot like Dionne Warwick) bestie?  And how she was lookin’ for the Black lady (Olivia) at OPA to help find Lois?  Well she was back tryna keep the landlord from evictin’ Lois.  She described for Liv how her and Lois was real close…how they had the same daily routine…calling each other upon wakeup; meeting for lunch; powerwalking in the park; taking turns cooking for each other.  She knew something had happened to Lois and she just wanted to find out what.

Liv put Huck and Quinn on the case, but they didn’t find anything.  Florence came back to Liv’s office with the serial number on Lois’ replacement hip.  And Liv put it all together.  “You are Lois’ power of attorney..you have a key to her apartment…wait a minute, were you and Lois dry grindin’?”  Florence acknowledged that she was livin’ foul, and said they fell in love with each other at 16 (but it was a different time, 16 years ago when being a Black woman was hard enough…Black AND lesbian was addin’ another layer of difficulty) and never stopped.  Even though Lois family moved her away and Lois went on to marry and have a family.  Said she never stopped lovin’ her, so when her husband died, Florence got on a plane within the hour and went to be with Lois.  They neva lived together cuz Lois kept that apartment too hot and Florence has bad hot flashes.

Huck and Quinn ended up using the serial number from the replacement hip to find Lois’ body (still not sure how that helped them find her without a tracking device, but okay..), and Liv told Florence that they found her on a park bench.  She had died of an aneurysm….and didn’t feel any pain, as flashbacks of them kidnappers shootin’ Lois played in her mind.  Said that she had simply fallen asleep.  And then Florence started crying an ol’ ugly cry ova that casket.  Chile, the only thang missin’ was the casket being open and Florence jumpin’ in.  I ain’t know what to think.  I am down for foke lovin’ who they love, but I felt some kinda way about them two ol’ retired wrankly grandmamas layin’ up in bed next to each other, nekkid and smellin’ like Icy Hot and mothballs.  At that moment, I was actually kinda glad Lois had gone on to glory…cuz y’all know how Shonda do.  She woulda had them in a sex scene with each other just as nekkid as they please.  And we ain’t need to see that.  Cuz I’m sure that even though it’s just a show, George Jefferson and Weezy woulda both rolled ova in they graves, cuz she is still  good ol’ wholesome Florence to all of us.  Til next time!

Follow me on Twitter @staylorclark

OliviaPope

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